I’ve experienced being one in a
million: every day when I walk through the streets of downtown Denver to go to school, every time I step onto a
public bus full of all different kinds of people, even sitting at a coffee shop
or in the library. Even though every person is different from each other, no
one seems to really stand out…most of the time. But I’ve also been the black
sheep before. When I went to a small rural town in Africa called Lira, me and
my 12 friends were the only white people there, and everyone stopped dead in their
tracks in the town square to watch us when we arrived—setting down wheel-barrels
of goods to sell at the market, and unabashedly observing us with mouth agape
and eyes bewildered.
Going to the Durango Songwriter’s
EXPO the weekend before last, I didn’t know which position I would be in. I
think every first-year Durango songwriter almost expects to be the exception—to
be the black sheep that the industry has been waiting for and that stands out
among the others. I saw many people who seemed to be in that boat, only to find
that when their song was over, the clapping audience was full of appreciative,
yet competitive songwriters who also hoped to stand out.
I can’t say I didn’t wonder how I
would be received there, but I’m also a realist. I knew who was going, and
I knew I wasn’t going to be the best. I heard that the Durango environment is
full of songwriters who are eager to co-write, enthused to network, and unconditionally accepting and supportive of each other. Even still, I doubted if underneath that
supportive façade there wasn’t a competitive side of the Expo I didn’t know
about. Would I be just another face among the crowd?
Going into an expo where you get
the opportunity to play your music for industry professionals: publishers,
label representatives, and supervisors, can be an intimidating experience, and
also a sobering one. I know several people who have walked away from the
conference feeling golden, inspired, and motivated, while many others leave
discouraged, rejected, and dismayed. It’s only to be expected that when one
gets in the company of so many incredible songwriters, they could respond by feeling
creatively inspired or jealously underappreciated.
Without any realistic expectations,
I showed up hoping to glean whatever morsels of wisdom I could from this
experience, whether it be good, bad or ugly. I brought two semi-final mixes:
Autumn Song and Evermore True, and high hopes for being organized enough to
make the most of this opportunity. I assumed the position of a white sheep, and
almost immediately sensed that I was actually in the company of all black
sheep—each songwriter was so talented and unique, and I felt like I could appreciate every one of them for who they were, no matter what the professionals said. If anything, it showed me
a whole new perspective on the mainstream industry and how it functions.
On Wednesday night, there was a
“Meet & Greet” at the Walnut Room for the Expo, which was an open mic where
people could get to know each other. I came with a few friends from school and
didn’t even to expect to get on the list because we were late. Somehow, they
pushed me in between a few people and low and behold,
it was well received! Because of that performance, they invited me to play in
the Thursday night showcase, an honor I never expected.
See a video of the performance
here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyPeSlBDf9o
Thursday was check-in night and
after the showcase, songwriters swarmed the hallways and lobby areas, eager to
start co-writing and sharing their songs until early into the morning, and this
didn’t stop until the weekend was officially over Sunday morning. I sensed that
these songwriters were genuinely jazzed to be in the company of so many creative geniuses. Throughout
the day Friday and Saturday, I alternated between three listening sessions and
workshops with professionals in the industry. Feeling somewhat like an outsider
looking in, I gaining tid-bits of knowledge and insight that gave me a wider
perspective into the industry and what they’re looking for, which made me
consider where I want to go next with music.
Most of all, it helped me to
realize there are two very different music worlds co-existing right now.
Artists can choose to be mainstream and join the radio culture of writing
hit-songs, which are very specific: form, hook, memorable melody, and catchy
chorus. Or, artists can be innovative, unique, and creative, expressing themselves freely but risking never
being noticed or “successful” in the most generic sense. Every artist has
that choice: to fit in or stand apart. Few can be both mainstream and
innovative, but Bon Iver is a classic example of someone who was only out to be
creative and do his own thing, yet ended up with a Grammy! My next EP is kind
of a hybrid: taking songs that don’t have a traditional form, and don’t
necessarily have all of the traditional components, but are produced in a more
mainstream way. I'm not sure what's next, but if it's possible, I'd love to hybrid the mainstream and the innovative.
No matter what, I will always
strive to be authentic and creative. I was amazed that although my songs are
not the specific hit-songs they are looking for, they were still surprisingly
well-received, so maybe there’s hope for me yet. I got very minimal negative
comments, and everything I heard was constructive and will help me move forward
in my songwriting in the future. Black sheep or white sheep, I found myself in
the company of so many incredible artists and supportive friends, I couldn’t
have asked for a better experience, and I can’t wait to continue networking and
collaborating with them in the near future.
I can’t wait to finish the EP and
share it with you. Keep up with my progress on my Facebook page: www.facebook.com/kaianutting and
look out for my EP when it is released November 8th!
